Major Life Transitions
Supportive Therapy for Life Transitions Provides Clarity and Guidance for these Disorienting yet Defining Phases of Life
Life Transitions (like Empty Nest) can turn our lives upside down.
They can catch us by surprise. We knew the change was coming, but did not expect the disorientation. And one day, wake and realize that we're not in Kansas anymore.
They may come as a grief and adjustment transition with empty nest syndrome, loss of a loved one, breakup, health crisis, retirement, and Loss of a community, career, or job.
But they can just as easily come as new beginnings, with the birth of a child, marriage, living together, living on your own, graduating, moving, and starting a career or job.
Either way, they challenge our identity, sense of purpose, way of life, and the way we meet our emotional needs.
The approach to take involves acknowledging that our lives have undergone a significant change. We're left to discover a new way of life in this unknown land.
It often takes a while to sink in that your previous phase of life is no longer available to you.
Your life has revolved around a routine and a reason for being for years now. And it may have worked really well. But now everything looks different. It's disorienting.
Your old skills don't seem to work in this foreign land. You're left to figure out how everything works all over again. This is typically way outside of our comfort zone.
At the emotional level, you may need to grieve. It's not just relationships and the death of a loved one that requires us ot grieve. You may need to grieve your old life.
Grieving this internal loss of our old way of being is subtle and is often overlooked. And you don't want to skip this part or elas it can remerge down the road
You want a clean slate for your new life. Even with therapy, it often takes time to grieve your old way of being. ggreieng yourself
Allowing yourself some time to fully feel this, and along with the guidance of a skilled therapist, is a most compassionate gift to give yourself.
This phase of life is challenging enough. You owe it to yourself to give yourself every advantage. It also allows you to move into your new life as quickly as possible.
A great mindset is to be open to discovering what this new phase of your life has in store for you.
Yes, it's true that life is just not the same, and your previous way of life is nowhere to be found.
However, this creates space for your next phase of life. If you can stay open to something different, your new way of life will begin to reveal itself to you.
It works best to simply start anew. You're different now. Ask yourself, what appeals to you now? What are you drawn to? What's that thing you've always wanted to do?
There's typically a trial-and-error phase. This is the only true way to figure out how things work in your new life
It takes perseverance. It's essential to build momentum for your new life. You have to stay with it when everything looks different, and you're having to reinvent your life.
It can be discouraging, but you don't have to do it alone.
It makes a huge difference to have guidance and support from a skilled therapist who has experience guiding people through these territories that are unknown to you.
So... why not receive some guidance and support for this challenging time of transition?
Major Life Transitions Specialties
Empty Nest Transitons
You've oriented your life around raising your kids for so long that it's become your way of life, identity, and purpose. Your life, purpose, and often marriage may require some soul-searching & restructuring.
Adjustment Transitons
Life Transitions involving Grief and Adjustment, such as Loss of a Loved One, Retirement, Breakup, Health Crisis, and Loss of a Community, Career, or Job, require grieving and readjusting your way of life.
Beginnings Transitions
Life Transitions involving New Beginnings, such as Birth of a Child, Marriage, Living Together, Living on your Own, Graduating, Moving, and Starting a Career or Job are exciting, but require reconfiguring your way of life.
Hi, I'm Michael
When I'm not playing the drums, exploring the Pacific Northwest, or interpreting dreams, I offer psychotherapy sessions with my root cause approach, which both relieves current symptoms and heals the underlying core issues to provide lasting freedom to fully enjoy life.
I bring 30 years of postgraduate experience and extensive training to create a personalized program tailored to your specific needs and situation.
My specialties include: 1) relationship issues and intimacy; 2) anxiety, depression, and social isolation;
3) men's issues and masculine roles; and 4) life transitions such as empty nest, divorce, and breakup.
I'm happy to guide you. Therapy works. Find someone you can work with. It's worth it. Whether it's working with me or somebody else, you owe it to yourself. If you'd like, schedule a free 15-minute consultation. I'm easy to talk to, and I'll help you get the ball rolling.
How Root Cause Psychotherapy Works
Phase 1
Relieve Your Current Symptoms
The first priority is to relieve the stress, pain, and suffering of your current symptoms. We'll work together to identify and understand your current symptoms. Then we'll design a personalized program that will alleviate your symptoms.
Phase 2
Heal the Root Cause of Your Symptoms
Now that you've identified your symptoms, we can trace them to identify your underlying core issues. Healing these core emotional issues frees you from future symptoms and helps you enjoy happiness, love, and freedom in your life.
Phase 3
Create the Life You Truly Want
Now that your symptoms don't define what you can and can't have in your life, you are free to create the life you choose for yourself. Ongoing guidance and support help you integrate the things you value into your relationships and daily life.
Major Life Transitions
Therapy Workflow
This is for those of you who like to see things broken down in the specific work we will be doing together. For some, the above section of the three phases will suffice. Either way is fine. We will address what we need to as we proceed in our work together.
While each client's symptoms of anxiety, depression, and isolation require specific interventions, the following is a general therapy workflow to treat current symptoms and underlying issues to achieve lasting personal freedom.
Phase 1 : Relieve Current Symptoms
1. Identify Your Current Symptoms Arising During Your Major Life Transition.
With your life history and experience, and my knowledge of the symptoms of major life transitions, we'll compile a list of your current symptoms. During our therapy sessions, we will work together to identify ways to manage each of these symptoms.
2. Identify the Aspects of your Previous Phase of Life that are Changing or Ending. Notice any Feelings.
Are you still identifying with your previous phase of life? Your life may have revolved around a routine, purpose and way of being for years. You may need to grieve your previous phase of life. This is a process of acceptance that you feel and ackhowledge the feeings of loss.
3. Identify the Aspects of your New Phase of Life that are Disorienting, Meaningless, or Overwhelming.
Your new phase of life may be unfamilar, uncomfortable, and depressing. Your confidence and sense of belonging may have been tied to your old life. With my guidance and support, you'll begin to build your new life one brick at a time. This requires exploration, perseverance, and the willingness to try new things.
4. Create a Personal Program to Relieve the Current Symptoms of Your Major Life Transition.
Together, we will design a personalized program that will alleviate your current symptoms. This program will provide a new orientation for your life and will replace the previous orientation you were conditioned to rely on.
Phase 2: Heal the Root Cause
1. Trace Your Symptoms Associated with a Major Life Transition to Their Underlying Core Issues.
Now that you have identified your symptoms, we can walk them back to identify your underlying core issues. Your symptoms point to your core issues if you know what to look for. By addressing your core emotional issues, you can free yourself from experiencing future symptoms and enjoy greater happiness, love, and freedom in your life.
2. Challenge your Limiting Beliefs Associated with your Core Issues.
We acquire various core beliefs about ourselves and the world in childhood, which are reinforced as we grow into adulthood. While these beliefs serve you for a while, they limit you as you grow and mature. We will explore the beliefs and stories you tell yourself that obstruct your life.
3. Disempower the Fear Associated with your Core Issues.
Fear naturally arises as you get close to what you want most. Since fear is future-based, you can break each fear down to an if/then statement about what you believe will happen. This format clarifies how fear limits your life and puts it into terms that are manageable.
4. Heal the Core Emotional Wounds Associated with your Core Issues.
Often, beneath all the symptoms, core issues, fear, and limiting beliefs, some deep-seated emotional wounds will emerge. They may arise when you become triggered by experiences. They often involve trauma, betrayal, loss, and abandonment. While sometimes painful and scary, these wounds surfacing present an opportunity to feel, process, and heal them, creating emotional freedom.
Phase 3: Create the Life You Want
1. Consider What You Want in Your Life Now that Your Symptoms and Underlying Issues No Longer Define what you Can and Can't Have in Your Life.
Now you have the freedom to choose and create the things you want for yourself. It helps to break down the things you want in your life into their core elements or essence. Examples of elements include love, friendship, abundance, community, intimacy, strength, and purpose.
2. Create a Clear Intention for the Life You Want.
When you offer your intention, it initiates and activates a new way of being. We work with what you choose to create in your life and boil it down to an intention for your life. This creates a crystal-clear focus for working with and integrating the things you want into your life.
3. Integrate the Things You Want into Your Life.
Taking action and practicing trial and error brings the things you want into your life. Introduce new approaches to your life, and notice what works and what doesn't. An updated personal program and therapy sessions provide the guidance and support to sustain these approaches long enough to integrate them into your life.
"The real core of the work I did with Michael is seeing how I have always been looking outward to define myself. What I have found in working with him is that I already had the resources within me to actually create the changes I wanted to make. For me, this has been the pivotal change. I have to say, Michael held my feet to the fire and that is what I really needed. He helped me get in touch with trusting my heart and moving from that place."
Steps to Your First Session
Step 1:
Consultation
Text/Call Office to Schedule Free Consultation
a. Text/Call our office to book Free 15-min. Phone Consultation to discuss your needs & determine therapy fit.
b. Office staff will Text/Call you to initiate your therapy journey.
Step 2: Register
Register Text Line
& Client Portal; Complete Forms
a. Respond to Spruce invite for text service. b. Respond to Therapy Notes invite to create Client Portal. c. Fill out forms in Client Portal. d. Notify office when forms are complete.
Step 3: Eligibility
Office Text/Calls on Insurance Eligibility; Book First Session
a. Office Staff will text or call you to discuss Insurance Eligibility.
b. Text/Call office to schedule your First Session. c. Receive a Video-Conference Link for your First Session.
Step 4:
1st Session
Create Your Personal Program in First Session
Together, in your first therapy session, we'll create a personalized program that resolves your current symptoms and explores their root cause for lasting relief & personal freedom.