People Who Can Support You as You Are

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MGVlJk0nZVA

Video Blog Transcription:

(00:00):

We need support, and we need conscious interaction to unfold the new, the spiritual, and the vulnerable elements of ourselves- the things we're awakening in our lives. And the good news is, there are people who are able to support these things.

A truth that I've come to know on this matter is: in any given situation, the person that you're interacting with is either able to support you as you are, or they're not. And it's your job to know the difference.

(00:47)

So different people are able to support and celebrate different aspects of you. So when you have something new and vulnerable that you would like to share, that you need to share so you can develop it in yourself, and unfold it in yourself. Think about who of the people you know might be able to support that part of you.

Perhaps it's your artist friend, who's a free thinker, and maybe the thing that you want to share is kind of a free-thinking idea. You might not want to pick a concrete-thinking friend, because they probably won't be able to support it. It doesn't mean that the person doesn't love you.

Just think about who might be able to support it, and then find that person, take them out for a cup of coffee or whatever else, call them on the phone, or whatever you do. And then begin to share that part of yourself and see if they're able to support it.

(01:49)

And you're going to notice whether they're able to support it or not based on how they respond. Are they able to empathetically be there with you? Are they able to stay present with you? Do they seem comfortable in saying, “Yeah, that's really cool?”

Are they able to support you, or are they getting more judgmental? Or are they debating with you or disagreeing with you? Or maybe they're just feeling uncomfortable, or maybe wanting to change the subject, or something. These are signs that they're not able to support this thing in you.

Then, of course, it's your responsibility at that point to change the subject and go back to relate to something that they're more comfortable with. And then you continue your quest. Well, who else might be able to support this new thing that I want to express in my life?

(02:50)

So in short, we're looking for someone who's able to celebrate this new aspect with us. And it's kind of this unconditional love thing. So even if it's dark, or even if it's like weird or moody, or woo-woo, or strange, or out there, or whatever else. Or really vulnerable. Perhaps it’s really raw; it might be this raw feeling. Or maybe it’s simply the pure beauty of your heart. Or this new spiritual awakening you've had that's still vulnerable to you. Whatever it is, no matter how weird it is or how unusual it is in our culture, they're still able to support it.

And if, unfortunately, they're not able to accept this new aspect of yourself, it's also your responsibility to kind of just accept the fact that this person is not able to celebrate that and hold space for you in that way.

(03:55)

And this could be sad. It could be your significant other. It could be your best friend. And perhaps it's someone that you really, really wanted to share this with. Or it's a person you go on spiritual retreats with, and you've got this new epiphany, and they're just kind of like, “I don't get it, or I don't like it.” So there may be a little bit of disappointment or even loss.

And it's important to accept, “Damn, I wish I could share this with the person, but I'm not able to. So now, who am I able to share this with?” It's like being able to kind of move on. And it doesn't mean that the person who wasn't able to celebrate it doesn’t love you. It doesn't mean you shouldn't go out with them anymore, or that they shouldn't be your friend.

(04:48)

It just means that they're not able to share and support you on this specific aspect of your new self. It's nothing more, nothing less is what my teacher used to say. It's so it's just time to say, “Okay, I guess I need to find someone else to share this with.”